Men! Ha!

posted at 16:36:20
By Flipping Heck!

Posted In
Personal

I was very naughty and bunked off work yesterday, a) Because I really couldn't face going in to the office and face the abuse and b) because the weather was so nice, so hence no post yesterday.

I met up with Mr Vain yesterday. I'm not sure if I've mentioned him before or not, especially in this context. We had a few drinks, things were going swimmingly and it was looking as though I'd finally manage to pin him down in terms of committing to a relationship with me then he dropped his little bomb-shell.

Apparently we can't go out with each other because I don't own a skirt.

Excuse me?

WTF?

"It's all about image" He said.
"Well, perhaps if you took me somewhere that warrented me wearing a skirt I might go out and buy one."
"But the point is you don't own one now."
"So you automatically think that I'd turn up to a posh restaurant wearing a T-Shirt and combats?"
"Well..... yes"
"I do have some sense you know. What's the point of me tarting myself up to go to the local pub?"
"Well....."
"'Well' what?"
"Like I said it's about image. Take my sunglasses for example, they cost me £160"
"So, I wouldn't have known that unless you told me, that's just poncy."
"But that's the point, that's me"
I threw my sunglasses at him, "How much do you reckon they cost then?"
He looked at them, "No name," was the first comment,"Fifty quid?"
"Ha! Try £2.99 from Woolworths. See you couldn't tell."
"That's not the point."
"Well, I'm the opposite I'm afraid"
"I'd best be off then."
"I think so."
"Fancy coming back to mine, I've got a hard on."
"No, thanks, don't think so."

I think I'm going to become a lesbian, that way all I have to wear are dungarees, no skirts involved....

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